Being Grateful in Difficult Times

No doubt, you are all aware that the Holiday Season is upon us. The calendar says so. Perhaps some of you are hosting the Thanksgiving dinner and, therefore, are a bit more sensitive to the upcoming traditional time to celebrate.

Yet, in these recent economic times, for many of you, it will be difficult to think in terms of celebrating. Rather, in times when things are tough, the contradiction in emotions may even bring on a sense of intense anxiety. Clearly, soon after Thanksgiving, Christmas and Chanukah and Kwanzaa occur. This year, especially, it may be a hardship to make the usual purchases.

Hard to find the good

So, is it possible to stay positive in these times? What, in fact, feels good in your life? Many families have a ritual that at the Thanksgiving dinner, they go around the table and each state that for which they are grateful. If you were sitting at this table and it was your turn, will you be at a loss as to what to say?

No doubt times are tough; in fact, they may get worse before they get better. But as I’ve said in previous posts regarding stress, you cannot control a situation. The key element in whether you experience stress or not is how you react to it. Another important factor is whether you can stay positive and optimistic.

Some tips

“Hard to stay optimistic with all that’s going on?” you say. Let me offer some tips. Many times, it’s very helpful to keep perspective. I hate when tragic things happen; of course, I don’t know many people who like them. And then I consider the lesson -- to help me remember what I have in my life, to not lose perspective of what is good, to not get caught up in nonsense.

In these pressing times, it’s important that you remember this, too. Is there an illness you or a loved one recently recovered from? Do you have good friends and or family that you know you can count on? Has there been a birth of a new grandchild? Have you touched someone’s life … the earmark of truly make a difference in life?

It’s also very important to look at the little things in life and start to appreciate them. Think about seeing the world through the eyes of a child with the same wonderment.

Notice the sunset, be aware of the birds singing, truly savor the food you eat.

Here’s an exercise that I learned in a class I took in Positive Psychology: Every night (it is more beneficial if done at night), write down three things for which you are grateful (the writing is also much better than just thinking). These items should be small -- you didn’t have to wait long on a line, you found a quarter on the street, someone held a door open for you. The more you focus on seeing positive things, the more you will see positive things in your life.

I remember once seeing a poster that said, “You can’t control the waves, but you can learn to ride them.” Finding the good in your life at this time will help make the ride a lot easier!

As I have in the past, I would again like to express my gratitude for the opportunity to share my thoughts with the readership of Thirdage. I have been writing now for a while and the fact that you are still reading I will take to mean that in some way I am touching your lives. For that, I am eternally grateful!

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